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Do I seek Pick-Up or is it Life that I seek?

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Jan 032009

For quite a while I considered myself a PUA and I guess I might still be. It’s something though, that as of yesterday started to bother me a bit. On the forum that I admin a member who I have a deep respect for called me a PUA and when I kind of down played it, he again called me a PUA, but the emphasis was on the artist aspect of it. So I really had to sit down and think this one through last night.

When I initially went out I was really in state, I was going to meet me a hottie and not to mention the hottie I have been working on at the Saucer. But, and it’s always the but that gets you, I completely lost my state and ended up with low-energy and actually pains in my body. My fellow friends were astonished at my low energy state and I guess it was with good reason as I am usually very passionate and exciting. I have a lot to talk about and get people interested in me, by being interested.

Today I again was soul searching, trying to figure out what went wrong. In retrospect it could be inner game issues I’ve posted about before creeping up on me again. It could be approach anxiety creeping into my game. It could be that I was just super-tired, but I think I have figured out what went wrong and in doing so have made a quantum leap in my game. You see I have never though of myself as a PUA, as I’ve always felt that was a bit creepy. I’m not out to meet women and get laid. I am out to experience life and all its magic splendor. Sometime that road will lead to getting laid, but hopefully more often than not, its the interaction itself that ignites that spark in me.

Ever since I have started doing Pick-Up I believe I have lost something. I don’t want to go out to just meet women anymore, I want to go out and meet people. I want to stop using acronyms that are meaningless to people unless they are a part of the PUA cult/religion. I hate the word sarge and lair, yet I find myself constantly referring to it. I am just not interested in being a PUA as much as I am a really cool guy who likes meeting new people. When your going out to meet people do you really get approach anxiety.

I remember very clearly how massentropy and I would go to Bealle Street and figure things out, but we would approach everybody. I don’t think there was much anxiety about it, as much as there is today. Perhaps I in pushing myself to exceed personal boundaries I am pushing myself in soliciting responses geared towards Pick-Up rather than having interesting conversations. Pushing myself for the wrong reasons.

I am a Life Artist and I live life to its fullest. I am pulling away from using weird little cult like acronyms and I’m just going to go out to have fun. No pressure Junky, just fun. Life is good and I believe I get what I want and I don’t want the pick up anymore. I want solid life interactions.

Making Eye Contact Makes the Difference

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Jan 012009

Well its New Years day and usually many people have already broken their resolutions. They took the time and wrote them down, but it’s OK today to break them since today doesn’t really count! Or does it? I mean today is the first day of the rest of your life right? I’ve gone ahead and written my resolutions and even emailed them to myself. I know what this year is going to bring already, I know that I will be immensely successful and I will achieve what I have put forth. My wish is for you to achieve what you desire as well. Just remember what you think about most is what you become. Think good my friends.

Today’s blog is about the significance of eye contact and how important it is as an ALPHA male to make and keep it. I read a book by Barbara and Alan Pease: The Definitive Book of Body Language which I highly-recommend to anyone looking to improve their game. A key element to making eye contact is not to be creepy. Make sure you are looking into the area that is triangulated by the eyes down to the nose. Do not look away, I don’t care how difficult it might be, master this area and you master confidence. Eye contact is key.

There are a lot of PUA gurus who give conflicting advice. Some say while holding eye contact you don’t smile until she smiles. while others say you smile wherever you are always. A man who is getting laid has fun and I agree with this. Smile where you are, but not a goofy smile, but a smirk, know it all smile, like yeah I get laid more than you do. Keep the eye contact and make her look away. Uncomfortable as it might be a woman will automatically increase her desire for you when proper eye contact is made.

Now that you have done that, walk, slowly but with determination and desire. You do know whats on the other side of the room don’t you? I’m not talking about a girl man, I’m talking about what’s between her legs. Your eyes should be undressing the package in front of you and you should be giving her the once over. She should know that you are rating her worthiness, she should be very aware of it. Walk with your shoulders back, head up a notch, cocky, an ALPHA, never break the eye contact. Let her break it. When she smiles you smile more.

Go conquer now, be fruitful and multiply with her. Well at least leave her crippled if you can:)

Social Proof is only adventatious when it is used

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Nov 102008

Many of my readers like to remain anonymous, many to the point of not even posting comments. I find this practice to be a bit strange, but recently it was brought to my attention that I was doing the very same thing. Looking back at this situation I continuously put myself into I never would have guessed it in a million years. Sometimes hearing it from a different perspective is enough to open up our eyes at social failures and encourage us to overcome self-imposed obstacles.

On Friday night I was invited to a Memphis Lair meeting. It had been a while since I had been to the lair website and even longer since I had posted. Working on a forum all day can turn me away from posting any type of results, whether from Pick-Up or Pheromones, but in truth have found myself turning away from many things Pick-Up. To me reading field reports is mundane to my existence and I have been trying to surround myself with socially viable solutions that promise the most value for my buck. I actively read Roissy in DC, Thundercat, Bristol Lair, The Rawness and a few others that I find to add value into my life. Not that others wouldn’t add value, but personally I don’t have a whole lot of time to sort through the crap to get to the good stuff.

Like I was saying, Friday night I was invited to a lair meeting. Now please understand that I really, truly despise the word lair. By definition Lair means and underground place that an animal uses to hide. By the very definition it almost seems that those who ponder social realism’s and attempt to get that area of their lives under control would then by animals who hide. Those who seek to improve in their lives are not animals and should be ALPHA enough to never hide what they do or are attempting to learn. I actively seek knowledge from men and women alike on how to better interact with society. This has enabled me to grow as a man and thus prove more valuable to society, but more importantly myself.

I found myself straying away from those friends who I call friends and honor them by using their knowledge and feeding them knowledge likewise. Friendships are interchangeable leaps of faith in one another. My friendship with members of the lair has been challenged lately, but not by those friends, but by myself instead. I have grown and changed recently. My friendships with PUA gurus has also changed. I have contact with some of the greatest names in Pick-Up and daily calls and meet-ups. I travel the world, have a show in production stages and meet very interesting people, but who is it that keeps me grounded. All of my friends, like myself have faults, I know of no one that really doesn’t. Those who say they don’t show obvious signs of social-disorders and need professional help to free themselves of demons. One friend, and yes he is still a friend, is so caught up in himself he really needs to come down a notch as he is alienating himself from others.

But this is where my title to this blog comes in. Wasn’t I doing precisely this, alienating myself, from my friends in my Pick-Up group, by not posting reports or anything that would be considered value? By my incessant search for value myself, I was moving further and further away from those I have come to call friends. After all friendships are about adding value, without seeking reciprocity or anything else in return. Friendships is the giving of one self absolutely. I learned something in that meeting that I never learned from talking to master gurus over this past year.

Humility is important in life when you want nothing in return, but as humans is this really even possible? Can we really not want something in return for those things we do? I forget who said what, or even if it was said by anyone, other than myself. I learned a valuable lesson that night, if you want social proof to work for you, than you need to use the social proof. Prophetic, it is not, but how many guys really understand it. I bet right now there are many readers thinking they get it, but when time comes to go out and use social proof they end up use it wrong and thus not use it at all.

During the meeting I told everyone that my sticking point to this day is opening sets in bars. How difficult I find it to say anything to all those pretty young things waiting for the JunkyFungus to bed them. I explained that I have mad social proof in some downtown bars. I have slept with several servers in one particular bar and every time I go there I never use it to my advantage. It hit me like a ton of bricks at that moment. By the grace of the God of Gab I have been blessed with amazing charisma. I can talk to anyone about anything. I never have a problem talking to guys in bars, so why women? What social conditioning breaks me down and limits my social skills in talking with babes in a bar? No issues in BuckyStars, so why not the bar?

The bricks were heavy and left a mark on my intellect. I realized I wasn’t using social proof to my advantage and thus not using it at all. Whenever I went into the bar I always found a guy or two to creep in between and say hi to the bartender, whom I slept with and order some drinks. She is always so accommodating to my game and says crazy great stuff like I never loved you, I only used you for sex! Geez, talk about making things easier.

On friday I sought her out and just before I creaped in between two guys I found the tightest spot between two babes and wedged my way between them. I smiled at them and commented how tight the space was with a big knowing smile. My bartender came over and immediately gave me the warmest smile. It was like she knew what I was up to. She said I’ll serve you the drinks tonight, but you’re not allowed to talk to me and left. The ladies on either side must of thought something was up. My bartender came back and gave me my beer and then said that she was sick and tired of me seducing her and taking her home. She was tired of me using her like some type of trophy for the night and then never telling her I love her. great stuff. The sets on either side of me opened me. I didn’t have to do a thing.

All I can say guys if you can get a bartender or waitress to hug you or tease you about sexual innuendo, you will never have to worry about opening sets. Sure I got blown out of some sets, but not because I was timid about opening sets, rather I was seen as a player. Me a player! Guys use social proof to your advantage. It’s always better to have people interact with women than not.

As always feedback is welcome:)

Expecting the Unexpected: The ALPHA Male is always prepared

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Nov 052008

Usually on Wednesdays I go out to downtown Memphis, to get my kicks on Beale Street, but tonight was different. Perhaps it is the work load I have been handling, maybe the anxiousness of the pending economic calamity that the press would have you believing, or maybe its that I didn’t go to bed last night until about 4 a.m.

I didn’t have the energy level to go to Beale, nor did I want to really. I definitely had to get out of the house though, and I promised myself that I would write a blog. I really want to keep up on my blog and a promise to the readers, I still have, I will do such. I know that I have said this before, but by all things good in this world I will honor my commitment. Lately I have been turned off by BuckyStars as the prices are just to high for this type of economy. On the same point, lately whenever I have gone to BuckyStars, apparently everybody else got the memo too, that its just to expensive to waste money on. Not to mention that, for the most part, their hiring practices have been less than desirable. I always liked the feel of walking into the local coffee house where everybody knew your name and welcomed you when you came in the door. That has just not been my experience lately there.

Resigning to the fact that I needed to get away from the whirr of the TV and the boring crap that’s always on, I decided to head out and give the old BuckyStars a last-ditch effort. Today was an odd day for me, I was showered early and out to the bank, but as with most days, my time is spent sitting in front of a computer monitor working on the Net. After a day of work, even though not labor or dirty, for some odd reason I find myself getting dirty from the Net. It seems like there is some type of electronic grime that builds up on flesh. The deeper I get involved in my worked during the day, the dirtier I get. Not sure really, what its from, but after ten hours in front of the Internet, my clothes smell, and I need a good hot shower.

Tonight was no exception, and yet as I said I felt tired and drained. Didn’t really feel like doing much, but I knew I wanted to get out. For a moment I actually debated about going out and just throwing on a hoodie and heading out the door. After all who would be at BuckyStars anyway? Nobody right! It really took myself looking into myself and observing my own actions (observing ones ego is a skill all ALPHA’s must have) to realize I was taking the easy way out. The ALPHA male is always prepared. Mom didn’t tell you when you were a kid growing up to wear clean underwear for no reason. She knew there was more to it than maybe getting hit by a bus. If you get hit by a bus, in all actuality you’re going to shit yourself anyway so clean underwear doesn’t mean squat!

Mom had that intrinsic juju that every woman has for ALPHA men. She knew that her baby boy could step out side that door any minute and discover the fascinating wonderful creatures they call woman. Mom was smart:) after all mom was a babe and she obviously had so much more social observational skills than any guy would ever have. Listen to mom, my brain was saying.

With a bit of trepidation that valuable blog writing time was wasting, I decided I would take a shower, don some clean clothes, PUA style and head on out the door. No excuses SteveO, you are ALPHA male and ALPHA’s always expect the unexpected. Dressed to the nines for a cup of coffee, even knowing full-well the only people at BuckyStars will be you and the angry gay-male Baristas. I figured maybe I would write about Barak winning the Presidency and ask everyone to pray for him and the USA. I jumped in the Beemer and headed out. I debated calling a few friends, but ahh I’d figure out something to write about. I always do and have been told I’m long-winded.

So I pull into BuckyStars and wouldn’t you know, one of my favorite Baristas is working. I was sure she had quit and I would never see her around again. Apparently they have a morning shift here too. I never would have guessed. Then to my amazement and happiness there she was. My Pixie friend from the other BuckyStars, they are closing due to the economic calamity I had written about a bit earlier in this post. I had been down there a few times and she just seemed to disappear so I thought she was gone too. Yup SteveO is dressed to the nines and she was like, wow every time I see you you’re always so stylish. IOI? You damn tootin it was.

Funny thing I was so enamored into talking to my favorite Barista I just kind of ignored her, which totally worked in my favor. No sweat though, before long the whole place was laughing and wouldn’t you know my favorite Barista would DHV me. She asked me how the filming was going for the production. Pixie expected me to elaborate on it, but SteveO was just like, yup it’s busy and hectic and by next year it will be in full production. Not to much info, but enough to peak curiosity.

I had my blog title and it’s an important one guys. Always be prepared, regardless if you’re going to the convenient store, gas station, laundry, whatever, make each impression your most important. Always remember the first impression begins with you at home in the mirror. Just imagine if I came out feeling grimy like I wanted to before. None of this would have happened. Things fall into place when you prepare yourself for everything, just like mom used to tell ya.

That’s certainly not the end of the story with Pixie either. The store has been streaming with babes all night and many of them know me. Pixie is wondering, just how does this guy, who is always so well dressed and styling happen to know everybody that comes through that door? She just told me she gets a break in about 6 minutes, so I will finish by saying, I’m going to get to know Pixie a little better on her break.

Making an Impact: Setting Yourself Apart.

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Jul 292008

Last I was in Santa Monica I got to meet two of the greatest Life Style coaches (PUA) I ever had the pleasure to speak with. I have been conducting an interview series that will be broadcast soon enough, but because of this or that there are the typical Hollywood delays. I have managed to secure interviews with some intriguing Pick Up Artists and most are famous in their own rights. One in particular has a TV show and is scheduled for NYC interview at the end of August. I’m excited about that one and look forward to doing it.

I will say that while discussing topics with these guys, they all seem to have different insights and while so diverse still all of them offer a common thread. Be comfortable and love yourself, and you will exude confidence. Be passionate about who you are and what you do and this will personify you as a confident man. Don’t try and become somebody else, just be the best of yourself. Most importantly though, whatever you do make an impact, whether its a good impact or a bad impact, just make an impact. Be memorable!

With that said I think a lot of us are always going to wonder what exactly does it mean to make an impact. I’ve seen one friend in particular who likes to try and start fights when we have gone out. Another friend and I have made a decision that this is not the behavior that is acceptable to us and therefore will no longer hang out with this other friend. This is not the definition of bad impact, this is the definition of ignorance.

When I was interviewing Jae Ellis we talked about something he described as using the awkwardness of the situation to propel you ahead of everybody else. I asked him what exactly he meant and I understood it like this: You basically see a woman that you like, say a hired gun. Now of course she is at work and for her she gets hit on all the time. Most guys would not care and in today’s dynamics with the VH1 Pick Up Artist Show and Mystery’s new found fame there are many more guys who suddenly think they are PUA’s and therefore many more who are approaching. I’ve read all the complaints and gripes about these guys on most of the seduction communities forums and I have to tell you it perplexes me. I’ll get into that in another post, but for now, just understand that many more guys are approaching the hired guns and most will crash and burn.

The one thing however they are not doing is recognizing that the situation, regardless of how common place is still awkward for them at work. Call this out to them, let them know that you are socially aware and you understand that they are at work. Say something along the lines of “I know this is awkward because you’re at work and yet I always believed that I should let people know whats on my mind. I have noticed you walking around out here and I just wanted to let you know I think your very beautiful. (PAUSE…. ) So what’s your name?

If you say this with confidence I guarantee you will get her name and she will ask you yours. It has not failed yet for me. Of course coming from me is not the best source, you need to do yourself a favor and go to www.AskRomeo.com and sign up for Jae’s course. I am not an affiliate and I am not making any money by telling you this. I tell you this because I believe it to be quality and beneficial. The guys at AskRomeo.com are incredible and just awesome. They are genuine and their programs blow everyone else’s away in my opinion.

I can’t wait till the interview is released. I know the video of Valentino will blow your socks off. There is so much quality in the Valentino video, just watching it will change most guys states. You could sell that video for hundreds and it would be a bargain. I’m telling you guys I can barely contain myself its that good.

I want to make sure you understand what I mean by calling out the awkwardness of the situation. Now I have a weight issue, in case you have not noticed, and if I was to meet a babe I would tell her if she was lucky she would get to rub the Bhuda by the end of the night. Women love it! The thing is you have to be super confident to get away with this. The very statement itself is super confident. What it’s doing is setting yourself apart from every other guy by letting her know you are comfortable and confident about who you are.

Lately I have seen pretty much every other guy also wearing Couture shirts and jeans. Peacocking is supposed to set you apart not make you look like everybody else. I try and dress a bit punk with a cross of uber cool. So like torn jeans and chains with $150 Florshiens and a silly T-shirt under a bowlers shirt while wearing a dress jacket. It sounds strange, but it sets you apart.

The key to this entire post is to make an impact. Sometimes making an impact is making a woman mad at you. It’s OK! Everyone will not always like you and not everyone will appreciate your humor either. Hardly anybody understands my humor, and you think I give a flying fuck. Hell no I don’t. There are times I have used a neg stack (again another post) on a hired gun and they will hate me. You can only do a neg stack on a hired gun and when it works she will be butter in your hands, but oh man, when it doesn’t son’t ever go back. Unless you want spit and piss in your food.

Just remember that if you want to make an impact be very cool with yourself and understand that you will not be able to please everybody. Have fun with life and as such others will be impacted by your passion for who you are. Don’t take yourself to seriously.

A not-so Private Life. When identities Clash!

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Jul 152008

Before I begin my blog post I will apologize to everyone for not keeping this up as much as I would like too. I’ve been super busy with work. I have been traveling the country doing an interview series which will be released soon enough. Once it becomes public, I will have more freedom to talk about it. I can’t say much other than it involves some very famous people and me interviewing them.

It’s difficult when you can’t talk about what you do. Although many, many people know me from PheroTalk, many more will son know me. My life is about to become public. I know, for me, growing up I always thought maybe I’d like to be famous, but it’s happening and its weirding me out a little. OK a whole lot!

I admit that it is very cool in its own attributes, but on the same token having people recognize you wherever you go is odd in itself. Normally when I go somewhere I usually end up going out and meeting people by chatting them up. I’m extroverted so talking to people is fun to me. Lately I have been recognized by people wherever I go. Now on the one hand its cool especially when its a babe, but on the other hand its weird having people want to take a picture with me.

What’s weird about it is lately I have been experimenting with Oxytocin “the trust hormone” and yet I find myself more trusting of my own instincts. So my instincts have been telling lately that some of these “new friends” are actually trying to use me for information, or trying to get close to the people I know. I don’t like fake people. Do you?

So I guess I am having an internal struggle over this new identity and how it will impact my life. I have been getting into some really cool clubs and meeting celebrities on the reg, but it will take some getting used too.

Bruising the Ego: It’s easier to be fat than it is to be unloved.

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Apr 102008

I had a revelation the other day and it will make you mad. It’s not the type of blog post today that is racist, political, religious or anything else that would typically make so many normal people angry when they read it. It affects us all and I know that most of my readers are going to disagree with what I have to say. In fact it’s the beauty of the subject I speak of and it gets right down to our core identity and in doing so it tears us apart inside leaving a gaping hole exposed for everyone else to see.

When we are weakened by the simple truth then the adage that the truth never hurts must in turn be a lie, or at least in this instance. When I first thought of my epiphany the other day it made me furious. I argued the thought to myself and repeated over and over in my head looking for a way out. Hoping among hopes I was wrong and this time I really wanted to be wrong. If you know me you know I like to play devils advocate and argue every conceivable avenue even when I know it is utterly useless to do so and it goes against everything I stand for. Not today, not then, not ever have I been able to come up with such an idea that my very existence as a human has been challenged. Everything I stand for and believe in is topsy-turvy now and yet somehow I believe I am a better man for it.

We all experience rejection and as an aspiring Pick Up Artist we come to value it as a learning curve, or as we call it in the industry “calibration.” We need to calibrate our actions, words, whatever so that we may overcome the obstacle that is put forth and push the interaction forward. It’s a part of every aspect of life.

What if we were using excuses like she didn’t like me because I’m short, fat, balding, smelly as ways to compensate for the real issue that she didn’t like us because we are unlikable to her. These real issues could be race, religious, personality, things we hold as core parts of our identity. Therefore the issue is made up to cover our own insecurities with our own ego. We can overcome being fat by blaming it on the weight and therefore having an internal mechanism that compensate the inadequacy’s and learning to cope with that aspect.

In turn we might even create an issue like weight every time someone wants to just be friends because it would be easier to undertake to emotional damage and isolate those feelings and learn to repress those emotions over time, after time, after time rather than deal with something larger than say an actual character defect. So wouldn’t it be easier to say I’m fat and I can get over that because I know I’m a great guy and she should like me for who I am, putting forth the blame back onto her. While at the same time using that weight defect as a compensating flaw that with time can be emotionally blocked from ireperable damage all the while taking the actual defect, a flaw in ones personality or character, that which is emotionally more damaging to our ego. Therefore we chose the easier and less damaging path.

In actuality it becomes evident that by using a defect that we can overcome we “choose” to become that defect to compensate for the actual flaw, whatever it might be, because one is less painful than the other. If this is the case, and I do believe it to be, I might eat unhealthy because I am creating a persona that is less emotionally damaging to my ego than say a character defect that I don’t have control over like the look of my face.

Creating an Identity around a pair of Old Rocker Boots.

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Mar 172008

I have an identity crisis. I think everyone at some point has an identity crisis. Most of us experience it a couple of times in our lives. Some call it puberty, when our voice starts to crack and our hormones go wild, in essence we become an adult in body, albeit our maturity has a long way to catch up. Then when we finally start to identify with ourselves and we come to grips with our lives, who we are, where we are, our job, our status, all of a sudden the “Mid-Life Crisis” comes a creeping! The stereotypical male goes out and buys a sleek fast sports car, while the female joins aerobics and gets a face lift.

Its always been amazing to me to watch my friends grow and develop as people throughout the years. I’ve had some friends who have identified with the music thing, and it dictates how they act and the very clothes they wear. Some of my friends have become computer geeks and its evident in their geeky style of clothing. Khaki pants, a polo style shirt with a logo of some software company embroidered on the front that barely covers their pudgy spare tire.

Typically the American media circus determine our stereotypes, now more than ever. Reality shows, far from any type of reality I have ever experienced, portray our lives and how we are supposed to live them. Radio and MTV plays the songs they tell us are popular, all the while the national news channels have gone 24 hours. Is Natalie Holloway really so important that even after a year we still are beleaguered with monthly updates, while Elliot Spitzer’s whore is making millions on bad music? Popularity has run amok.

We are preached to from every angle of how we are supposed to walk, what to eat, drink, when to shit, cry, sleep. TV is a mad commercial filled with advertisements for the “Wonder Cure” for every conceivable ailment ever known to man, some ailments that have not even been named yet. We are bombarded with infomercials for “Hip Hop Abs,” “LA Weight Loss,” wonder pharmaceuticals! Diets for this, creams for that, these jeans will make you a super model. Buy, buy buy, call 1-800… Identities are fast becoming not who we are, but more so who they want you to be.

I turned forty last September, and by every account I should be going through an identity crisis. It is my right and it has been bestowed upon me by the moguls of media and social hypes. I should have two kids off in college, a house and car payment, my wife and I are both overweight, but we have a health plan and are looking forward to retirement. We sit in front of TV and watch Fox News at night and cry for our troops and damn President Bush. We go to church on Sundays and live our dream, the American dream.

But that’s not me. I’m forty years old and I don’t fit into that mold, or any other that could describe me. Well maybe I am a bit overweight! I look back upon my life and I really don’t recall ever maturing, or having this epiphany where I came to grips with maturity. I’ve never had a desire to hold down a job or work a career. I have enough college credits for two degrees, yet no degree hangs on my wall. I’ve studied journalism, computer science, history, English, philosophy, psychology and a few others all as majors. I’ve written for magazines and newspapers, owned companies, served as a grunt in the US Army, but even today as I write this I have no direction, no desire to grow up to be something. Even as a child I had no goals to grow up to be a fireman, or for that matter anything else.

So when we don’t have aspirations or fit into the corporate mold or the ones standardized by television marketing where do we fit in and how do we create our identity? A student of life I seek out knowledge to help me in understanding myself and bettering my interactions with others. About three years ago I stumbled onto the “seduction community” and although I’ve made it this far without a personal avatar I realized it was an essential part of being according to most everyone.

I was walking around in life without being anyone let alone who I was. I had no clear vision of what I wanted to be or who I even thought I should be. Most people identify who they are, by what job they work. Ask someone just entering into the seduction community who they are and they will say a “Pick Up Artist.” On the other hand ask a true master of seduction in the community who they are, and they might answer “A student on the road of life.” Striking differences and who is right?

There are times when I go out and I wear my hair slicked back NYC style with lots of jell. I’ll wear my cream colored sports jacket, burgundy polo dress shirt, black slacks and $100 shoes. When it’s sunny you’ll always see me with my $300 Oakley’s on. Open collar means thousand dollar gold chain hanging round my neck. Formal: I’ll be wearing my Fosil watch for sure.

Lately I’ve been dressing a certain way to create an identity through clothes. Like I’ve said though, most people identify with their jobs when you ask them who they are. I love my job and I must, considering most weeks I work about 70 to 80 hours doing it. I work for the worlds largest pheromone producer and probably have a cooler job than most people can even dream of. But where does that lead me in identity and is it really who I am? My job does not define me as a person, it is not my core identity. By definition I cannot say I’m the rocker, or the preppy guy. What if my identity crosses the boundries of all music and cultures.

I sought out a pair of boots, the kind that are made to look distressed and they have the buckle on one side. They look like a pair of old rocker boots. I finally found a pair at the mall (rocker boots at the mall! Oxymoron?) and I decided I would next create an identity around them. I bought myself a wallet chain, some silver pinky rings with Celtic cross cutouts on them. I dyed my hair black and lately I like to wear jeans. I’ve noticed that whenever I’m out and I see someone similar in dress they nod their hello. When ever I am wearing my stylish executive level clothing I get my due respect from the other suits in the business world. Have we really become a society so dependent on identifying the person by the clothes they wear?

Funny thing though, is that most self-help books and such all tell you you have to start with being yourself. Connecting with yourself so that you can forge the bridge of emotional stability with the world. That’s where it all seems to get lost for me. You see connecting with my core identity means I can connect with just about every identity out there. I am just as comfortable wearing leather pants as I am wearing slacks from Brooks Brothers.

It makes me wonder what my core identity really is. Can I find a way by wearing clothes to identify my identity or can I walk around unidentified and by being unidentified wouldn’t that be an identity of itself? Do I really need an identity after all? Isn’t it all just marketing that tells us we need an identity so that they can better connect with us on a marketable level? Conceivable then, isn’t it possible to be invisible just be avoiding all media hype on class or would that be the rebel class and thus a marketing connection made. Do I feel like this is the Matrix?

In the seduction community there is a term called peacocking. By definition it is the guy who stands out the most by wearing outlandish clothing but being congruent with it. They are the ones who get the most attention and are looked on as brave and exciting and now most guys are doing it. So by being the guy without that identity am I the one guy who stands out in the crowd while everyone else wears glow necklaces and top hats.

I sought out a pair of boots, the kind that are made to look distressed and they have the buckle on one side. They look like a pair of old rocker boots. There about the most peacocked article I own. I created an identity around those boots, or maybe those boots created an identity around me.

Bored On Beale! An Epithany

Inner Game, Personal Avatar No Responses »

Jul 212007

Massentropy and I, like every Friday night, went down to Beale street. There were some sets there, but nothing too spectacular. I opened a couple, but all-in-all it was a lackluster night.I think maybe it could have been better but the energy level was less than optimal, which will always bring down the sarge. This can be tied directly with doing the same old thing day in and day out. It’s not that Beale Street is a bad sarge place, or for that matter a club like Senses, it would just seem to me that PU is the skill of social dynamics.

Social Dynamics IMHO, is not something you try and fake or become, it simply is you on your most basic levels interacting with others on their basic levels. There are no smoke and mirrors, it’s just two persons talking as they would to anyone else. It to me is the beauty of the system that got me into PU.

The naturals all go out and just talk to people, they do not try to assume this identity of something they are not. It is called natural game, because they are being the fun friendly person they are. They don’t assume the role of the collector and lover of widgets because their target does. They express their interest or distaste if that is how they feel. It’s not about becoming someone else and masking who you are, it’s about expressing your true identity and becoming that person completely, take it or leave it.

Canned routines are OK to get the ball rolling, but once you are in set your natural identity must shine forth. It is you after all that is the prize and you must be that prize. I look at it this way: A shiny green apple (By all things squishy and pink I love green apples), plumped and perfect on the outside. It’s inviting you to take a big bite out of you. Enticing you to sink your teeth inside of it. You begin to salivate thinking how once you bite into it, you can hear the cracking of the skin, the juice exploding into your mouth and dripping down your chin, ahh heaven.

Wait a minute, did I tell you a family of worms has made their home on the inside. So while it looks great on the outside, whats on the inside is uninviting and nasty. So I ask myself am I being true to myself by attempting to go out every Friday and Saturday and be that guy? Maybe not, maybe I should forget about being that guy and just be myself and go forth as who I am. I enjoy going out to the clubs and having a good fun night dancing and being crazy. I enjoy people for who they are and always through life I’ve had lots of female friends who were just friends. I am going to focus more on interactions for friendship sake and evolve my game from there.

I believe that by realizing this paradigm, that I have evolved. I am not a PUA, I’m SteveO, OZZY Osborn and I am a man of the world. I have High-Value and all I have to do is be myself and my natural game will shine through and I will achieve the desired results I seek.

I realize that there are skills that I know, super-powers if you must, but they are skills of using your persona to break through others defenses and be recognized for the value you give. I have to stop trying to be a PUA, while using PUA skills and be SteveO, Master of My Universe.

Two Steps – One Step

Inner Game, Personal Avatar No Responses »

Jul 142007

So PFC and I were talking today about some progress I have made and some steps backward I have taken.

Lately I have noticed over the past few weeks that I have been approaching less sets. Where as in the past I would approach massive sets, but found myself getting g blown out of most if not all of them. Where now I approach less sets and manage to stay in set longer and observing myself in real time. It takes strong inner game to be able to catch yourself doing something incorrect and immediately correct it.

This has brought me to the conclusion that my two steps forward and one step back wards actually strengthen my game in that the one step of progress becomes more solid. In each step that is accomplished it becomes more acknowledged in the successes of that step.

It is not regressing, but it is making solid gains.

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