I happened upon this article on Match.com when I logged into BuckyStars ATT wireless connect. Stupid landing pages, but hey what’s this? Usually I get annoyed that there’s a landing page in the first place. If I’m going onto the Internet at BuckyStars, its for damn sure I’m not looking to read their landing page. I mean really! What in tarnation could they possibly offer me that I would be interested in?

Well wouldn’t you know it just as I was hit my blog link all of a sudden I see a title that reads: How to prep your place for a date. Of course I had to go back and read what they had to say. I mean usually most “advice” sites are going to emasculate men into believing they need to be little wussies with no balls to get the job done. In most instances its exactly why men need dating sites in the first place. They do not have the social skills to pick up a woman in a normal social environment. As in face to face meet up like a bar, club, book store, coffee shop what not.

I do believe I owe an entire other post to the other extreme where some men are acting out aggressive fantasies on blogs of who they wish to be. Reading some “field reports” you would have to believe the man in question to be a God to pull off some of the crap I’ve read. But I digress this discussion for another time.

So I want to review this Match.com article piece by piece.

Make your space look appealing to the opposite sex…
This applies especially to men, whose pads often resemble frat houses filled with mountains of laundry, grime-covered sports gear and empty beer bottles. First, clean up the mess — laundry in particular. “I’ve always found that the scent of dirty, sweaty clothes permeates single men’s apartments, so when I first visited my now-boyfriend Kevin’s apartment, I was happy to see that he had a real laundry basket with a lid,” says Esther, 31. No need to buy a whole new set of furniture — folding a chenille blanket over the back of your austere leather sofa or adding some flowers can do wonders. “When I first saw my boyfriend’s place it was pretty unimpressive, but he had a vase of daffodils in the living room, which made a difference,” says one 25-year-old who prefers to remain anonymous. “It showed he knew how to make an effort and was willing to do so for me.”

For the most part I would agree with this section of the article. However being well-versed in the scientific appeal of pheromones having sweaty clothing around can help you in many instances. You don’t need your nasty encrusted underwear around. While having a place for laundry and keeping your love lair clean it is also important to not make it sterile. I went over a friends house once and the place looked like it was devoid of any personality. It seemed like books and pictures were strategically hung and placed to bring up conversations. While normally this is a very good idea, these things need to have “VALUE” to you and not just be crap you read about in some PUA forum somewhere. Don’t get a book on magic or hypnosis or whatever unless it is something that you have read and are interested in. Another; don’t be a faker, woman can sense when all you are trying to do is impress them. While it might make an initial impression you are sure to be sleeping alone if that’s all its for. The impression should come from the interest it provokes, initially from the item, but the real interest should be directed towards you for being an interesting person for reading this to begin with.

I totally disagree with the flowers crap. What are you a freaking girl or a man? Holy freaking crap are you serious? Flowers? An interesting center piece is what you need. Get yourself some really cool art as a center piece, maybe some candles, scented if you really must cover the smell but remember your pheromones are important. Have a bowl with assorted items that have been left by other women. It’s a GREAT little “pre-selection” switch flipper when a woman sees an earing or thong, or a shoe in the bowl. Whats that, inevitably she will ask? Oh that’s the bowl with a sly smile and move on. I just asked the Barista Melissa at BuckyStars, a cute girl, what she would think if she walked in to see flowers on the table of a guy she is dating. Her response: “He’s either married or gay!” Come on guys, don’t be that guy. The chick who wants to remain anonymous who was impressed by the guy making an effort, most likely is the chick I’ll be doing later on tonight.

Edit what’s on your bookshelves: And while you’re at it stash away your masculinity. When I read this I almost spit out my coffee and started cursing. Who the fuck wrote this crap anyway I asked? The by line reads Celeste Perron. Of course you should hide away all your books with beautiful women and interesting male articles in them. My God you wouldn’t want the woman over your apartment to think you look at other women. While you’re at it you might want to tie your dick and balls between your ass-cheeks and wear a dress! I mean God forbid you give her the idea you might be interested in hot bodies and women in lingerie. Isn’t it funny that whenever I have woman over they always pick up my copies of Maxim or FHM before anything else. It’s a damn good way to let you know if she might be interested in a little kinky threesome fun too.

The rest of it seems like OK for the most part, but holy BeJezus I can almost feel my masculinity ripping out of my soul and being dragged across the floor. Sometime in the future I’ll do an entire post dedicated to how you should hook up your apartment to make it into your very own Love Lair.

Rock on dudes!

I’ve been thinking about writing but I do so much of it at my job, that I sometimes just don’t have the ambition to blog anything. I’ve changed over the last year and now I do quite a few things differently then I used to. I have decided to do some serious gaming though, so that should add a bit of flair to the diary of a junky. It infects my life and sends me into bliss so that I may not escape. Ahh life is tremendously good right now for me. I am in such a good place with myself.

Yes its true! You might not believe it, but I suffer from severe approach anxiety, but only in the bar. I’ve overcome my anxiety everywhere else, but when I’m in a bar, for some reason I freeze up. It’s something I have been saying I will be working on, but as with most anxieties, its easier to put it aside than to actually work on. I’ve made it a point however, to let everyone in my pick-up community know about it so now, I will have no choice but to overcome it. I am sure they will be pushing me into sets, but on that same token, now that I have come out with it publicly I believe I will in turn push myself further.

We all have these little nagging things that we know we can do better at. Many of us believe we can beat our anxieties by ourselves, but that is a good way to not accomplish anything. From experience what I have learned in life if you have something that you are trying to accomplish tell your friends. By putting it out there, you are essentially setting a public goal to those who you care about. By setting the goal as public your friends will push you and you will also need to push yourself, or you will not only be letting yourself down, but also those you told. It’s like reverse psychology for your own brain.

I decided that I wanted to re-read the VAH handbook and it has made all the difference in my progress. When I was in San Diego a few weeks ago I was talking to Blitz, Mystery’s wingman, about some techniques and game. He picked right up on the deficiencies in my game and asked me when the last time I read the Mystery Method. It has been at least a year and he said he was always amazed that aspiring PUA’s have all the basics in the book and yet only read it once.

I guess he is right though, as since I have started reading it again it has opened my eyes to everything I haven’t been doing or have just forgot. I also have noticed the more time that had elapsed between readings the less and less I was actually pushing myself to open sets. I was taking the easy way out and after so much effort that was not going to be acceptable.

This past weekend was just incredible. It started on Wednesday and ended early this Monday morning. Yeah I’m tired and my throat is sore from all the yelling, I’m hung over and not feeling very motivated today but there is something else going on too. Normally a day that I am beat and feeling it I would have dreaded going anywhere. Maybe through on some shorts and a T-shirt and a hat and off to StarBucks not really caring about appearances, or even worse just staying home.

Not this time! Oddly enough I was yearning to get out, even though I am super tired and not feeling very social I still busted out the ironing board, pressing even my shorts. Avatar is who I am and I am ALPHA and as an ALPHA I am confident and am always aware of whats around me.

So how does this all tie into reading the VAH book again? It’s really simple. I’ve been relearning the skills that brought me so much success and with those skills come responsibility. Not so much to anyone else, but more to myself. First impressions start with myself and as such they start internally. This internalization has caused a spark inside me to ignite the inner fire of challenge. You see I believe that theory is only power if we can transpose it to application and application can only take us as far as we are willing to push the envelope.

Last night I closed an HB9 and I’ll say that she was easily that because she had drive that makes me want to be around her. Sure she is a Beer Goddess at the Beale Street Flying Saucer and yeah the more she flirts and talks the more tip she gets. The difference is just how far I was willing to challenge her to be a challenge to me. I set myself up, not as a customer, but as a fun guy who made her laugh and cry and feel frustrations, heat, sadness, love and many other emotions each time she came around. She didn’t know what to expect of me every time she came by.

I watched her interact with many other tables last night and every guy was just falling over themselves to appease the babe. They made it a point to thank her and tip her and ask her “normal” questions. SteveO challenged her to serve him better than any of the other waitresses there. Be something different than the typical customer, make an impression. The only way you get better at something is when you push things to the extreme even at the risk of failing. After all is it failing if we learn and can then push further next time?

I watched as every guy watched mine and her interaction and for the first time in my life I heard a guy call me an asshole to his buddy. He said I wouldn’t get anywhere with her, or something to that matter. Funny thing was that guy was me many years ago. The nice guy, the follower, abiding by the rules, but always alone.

Our table was the wildest and the drinks and conversation were flowing. Pictures were flashing, our loudness was the loudest and all my lair friends were working the room. At the end of the night everyone knew us and some dude hater snickered to his friend on what an asshole I was. When I came back from the bathroom Jennifer had taken my unsigned charge slip and gave it to a friend. I called her a punk ass and stared her down until she smiled. I smiled and caught dude hater looking in awe as I said I like your style kid. Write down your info for me. I watched as every guy in the room stood in awe as Jennifer, the hottest one in their without question, took a beer coaster and wrote the info down. With a big smile she hands it off and I grab the pen from her and say I’m keeping this as ransom. She smiles and tells me she is going to get her pen back and that she guarantees it. I say deal and walk off. When I passed the table of dude hater I say loud for him to hear it,”Yep I’m an asshole.”

None of this would have happened if I didn’t challenge myself to challenge myself in everything I do.

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